Friday, February 5, 2010


Perspective is a funny thing. It can come to us from many sources. Usually I find it comes at me when I need it and when the rest of my focus seems to be spinning out of control. I have 4 beautiful and healthy children. They are not perfect. I am not perfect. My life is a mess and so far out of my ability to manage right now that I spend far too much time in stressed out panic. I, however, do not have to deal with

This - a life irrevocably altered by a fiery plane crash


This - being the mother who has lost her son and grandson given the same name


This - having a baby drown in the bathtub on my watch; alive but struggling to survive


This - being the daughter of the mother who lost her son and then my own son given the same name.

and suddenly I have perspective. My life is not that bad. My troubles are not that awful. My heart ache is minor. My trials are mine to bear and I have the strength to do it. If they can do it, so can I.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

January 4th

Today I am thankful for the ability to figure how to work the creepy crawly on our swimming pool, to stake the windblown trees and fix Jessica's scooter. . .

I really don't want to be thankful I can do these things. . . I really want to be thankful that someone fixed them for me. . . BUT, I guess I am really thankful that I am strong enough and willing enough to try and be resourceful and do so many more things than I really have ever wanted to do.

Recently I was thankful I was strong enough to pack and move and unpack our house and unload 3 pods with some help, but a lot on my own. . . again I wished I just had someone to do it all for me, but again, am grateful I have a healthy, strong body and the umph to take it on and do it myself.

Well, maybe not as grateful as I should be, but grateful nonetheless. . .

Monday, January 4, 2010

New Year's Resolutions

I've never been very good at making or keeping resolutions. I'm good at thinking about them and taking account of the not so stellar bits of my character. This year I've thought a lot and I'm not going to pick on myself so much. I'm going to instead focus on resolutions that I know will bless my life and naturally improve me and those not so stellar bits of my character.

1. Attend the temple at least Monthly. I went January 2nd! Yeah me! I was spiritually uplifted, strengthened and renewed. I will report monthly on my gratitude blog on my progress.
2. Listen to and not question the whisperings of the spirit. It was this whispering that took me to the temple on Saturday. I was prompted to go and then I looked at around at my house and thought of the week ahead and decided I should wait and go after I took the kids to school one day this week and then I thought, no, I was prompted to go today. I went (made it to the very last session of the day) and knew I was meant to be there. It was this whispering that led me to bear my testimony in sacrament meeting yesterday and it is these whisperings that will take my where my Heavenly Father wants me to be and I KNOW that this will lead to greater happiness than I presently know and make me the better person that no number of nit picking resolutions will ever help me to be!

That's it. . . no diet, no promise to write in my journal every day, no ideas of turning my 40 year old body into a super model figure, no swearing off bad days or bad words, no giving up diet Coke (at least for now) and no promises to myself that I probably won't keep. . .

Happy New Year!

154-195 Things I am Grateful For

154. A comfortable and nice home
155. A pool and playground in the backyard
156. Healthy Kids
157. A New Year
158. My bed
159. Advil
160. Hot water in the shower (6 people, 50 gallons, just didn't last!)
161. A dishwasher that works
162. A phone line in my new office
163. Children that still believe
164. My car
165. Gas in my car
166. Food in my fridge, pantry and extra to boot!
167. Freedom
168. My wardrobe (which was in storage for a while!)
169. My own bathroom vanity again
170. Salt City Candles (I just adore them! There aren't any better!) Evergreen, Candy Cane and Pepperberry Wreath at Christmas, Pumpkin Spice in the Fall and Home Sweet Home or Pomegranate the rest of the year!!!
171. My computer
172. My camera
173. My cell phone
174. My Ipod (even though it's a dinosaur!)
175. Christmas Music
176. Weather under 70'
177. My faith
178. My testimony
179. Christmas cards, letters and pictures from friends
180. My health
181. Friends that love me
182. Time spent with family
183. A love of cooking
184. Yummy carmels
185. Peppermint Tea
186. I didn't need anything for Christmas
187. The surprise framed photo of Montana my brother sent me for Christmas
188. School Vacations
189. Each new day to try again
190. Ann John and her family
191. The Garden Lakes Ward
192. The Estrella Hills Ward
193. Our NEW Canyon Trails Ward
194. Elizabeth's late night visit
195. Paula's listening ear